Some situations are viewed in black and white; right and wrong. Yet, many people think situations also have a grey area where solutions are not so easily discerned. This is not just about the choices people make, but the thought process they go through to arrive at their decisions.
What Do You Think? Submitted for Your Consideration and Conversation
It is the first day of the new school year and you’re driving your daughter to school. She is going to middle school for the first time, and you want to walk her in and help her pick up her schedule and find her new classroom.
You arrive and walk into the school. The two of you run into a good friend of yours by the office, as your friend’s daughter is also starting middle school. The girls begin chatting and catching up.
You hadn’t seen your friend over the summer. When you last saw her in June, she had just started dating a man and had been excited about the summer break to do some “family” things. She seems embarrassed, but also happy to see you and talks a little as you wait in the school office. You quickly find that your usually perky friend is not so perky. And you can tell that she has a big black eye, even though she’s tried to cover it with makeup.
After the girls are checked in and off to class, you pull your friend aside and ask her how things have been going. She says their summer was fine. Then she says she needs to go because her boyfriend is waiting in the car and she doesn’t want to keep him waiting.
While you’ve only had a short time to catch up, you have a strong feeling that something is terribly wrong in your friend’s life. Do you think that it would be helpful to let your friend know that you can see her black eye and ask if she is being abused? Do you feel that it might be too bold with how little information you have? How comfortable would you be walking her to her car to get a look at the boyfriend? Or, do you just let it go?
Alternatively, what if her little girl had marks on her? Would you be more willing to ask your friend what’s going on?